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Grades, Games, and Girls

Dear Dr. Nello:

My grades in graduate school have been suffering ever since I subscribed to GameTap and got a girlfriend. Should I be worried that I have an A- average if my game play is at an all time high and my girlfriend is A++ hot? I need help!

-- C is for Confused

Dear Hay is for Horses:

I'm confused: you've subscribed to GameTap and also got a girlfriend? How is that possible? Unless of course you mean you've created a cybergirlfriend. I'm sorry to tell you that computer generated females do not count as legitimate partners. You should terminate the simulations immediately! I suggest getting in touch with "Bend." I think the two of you could benefit greatly from meeting. But after that get rid of your GameTap subscription. It's doing more harm than good.

As for your suffering grades, I'll let Nurse Chris answer.

-- Dr. N

Dear C:

The reason your grades are falling isn't because of too much game time, but rather too little. It's a proven fact that video games help improve hand-eye coordination which in turn will somehow help your studies. Dump the girl!!! "Women" = "rules agains video games." No girl, more games: higher grades.

If your grades continue to fall, I suggest counseling.

-- Nurse Chris
| | Friday, January 12, 2007
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3 comments:

Dr Nello said...

no.

Justine said...

Funny stuff and good advice.

And if one of you is responsible for leaving rude messages on my blog--knock it off, please.

Justine said...

My apologies here as well. You have been cleared of malpractice.